From a gender focused diversity discussion to an all-inclusive solution

Date: 1 October 2019 | Author: Edina de Jong – Hodzic

When we talk about Diversity and Inclusion, I noticed we most often jump to the gender aspect. I find that by doing that, we’re creating an (un)conscious separation between the two traditional genders: women and men. Also, we exclude everyone else from this discussion and solution who might not feel part of either one or the other group. How can we find a sustainable solution for this collective issue without creating further separation?

Certainly not by creating a belief that women are disadvantaged, disempowered or such. This opens the door for women to feel victimized and allow others to take advantage of the situation. I was talking to a friend the other day and she was talking about Diversity within the company that she is working for. She said that quite some women in her organisation blame men for not progressing in terms of their career. Blaming is a form of victimhood and creates disempowerment. My friend also told me that men on the other hand are equally fearful because they fear that if the quota for women is introduced their position will be impacted. It seems that both parties are afraid (for different reasons).

Let me first recognise that throughout history the position of women has been challenging and this has created deep psychological wounds in our societies and not just with women, men have also been wounded in many ways. This is where we are today and I also see things are changing. How can we accelerate this change?
1 – By realising that we’re all in the same boat. This is not a woman’s issue, this is a human issue.
2 – By acknowledging your personal ‘behaviour’ in this situation. I find it very useful to work with archetypes. Archetypes have gained popularity in modern psychology with Carl Jung who explained them as models of people, behaviours or personalities. Many others have used them as a base for further research. Examples are child, mother, father, victim, saboteur, queen, king, fool, rebel etc.
3 – By making a choice if you want to transcend your behaviour or you want to keep it (what’s in it for you?).
4 – By taking conscious actions (this is a continuous process) towards transformation.
5 – Celebrate every success!

The truth is that nothing is going to change if you don’t change. And I mean real change. Finding out who you are, why you do what you do, what are your deep desires, what are your fears, what drives you to create? It’s these questions that will push you to see beyond victimhood and other instinctual patterns. These are questions relevant for all human beings in order to find our true potential and thrive in life.

I have experienced this at first hand some years ago when I was living my corporate career. There was a period in time that I have blamed the system and my environment for not being supportive of me as a woman and help me to progress in my career. At that time, I was blind to see that I was sitting in the ‘victim’ chair that we so often do without even realising it. It was only after I left my corporate career and started my personal realization journey that I have realised how much of my authentic strength (power) I was giving away to circumstances and others and disempowering myself. It is important to emphasise that nobody is a victim in life. We always have a choice how to react to a situation.

My message to organisations and institution is to create awareness and a safe environment for the discussion & solutions to evolve. And to keep investing in the growth of employees by providing coaching and leadership development solutions.

Let’s go!